Details! Details! by Elaine H. Baldwin

It’s crunch time for the Baldwin Clan. But we are not in a panic and I am confident we will not be in a panic during wedding week and even on“V-Day”, as Valerie has come to call her wedding day; the day she becomes Mrs. Zack Valentine.

The reason we aren’t “sweating the details” is because we have paid attention to those very details and at the same time, held those details loosely in our hands because we can’t control 99% of the circumstances surrounding said details. It’s taken me awhile to figure that out.

As my poor kiddos and husband can attest, I have too many times let the details control me which wasn’t very pretty to watch much less experience. And it would be easy and probably politically correct to say that now, “I don’t let the details control me, I control the details.” But that wouldn’t be the best God has for me either and is really an oxymoron anyway.

It’s really quite impossible to say we control the details because we have absolutely no control over anything. Even the next breath we take is completely out of our hands. And all God has to do is send a little snow or send a little wind and all our human grandiose plans come to a grinding halt!

That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t plan or take care of the details, though. The Bible is full of God taking care of details and expecting us to do the same. From creation to tabernacle building to manna gathering to festival planning to 12 baskets full of leftover food or washing some else’s feet, God is all about details. And He has plenty to say about the slothful, foolish, lazy person who refuses to even think about the details let alone take care of them. And none of God’s thoughts or treatment of such a person is pleasant.

So, Valerie and I, with the help of so many have thought about, listed, re-listed, and taken care of as many details as possible in getting ready for “V-Day”; well really “V-Week.” It is our hope that by attending to as many details now, the wedding week will be an enjoyable and even relaxing experience for everyone involved.

Now we are not so naïve to think there won’t be any glitches to our details during wedding week. That’s the whole reason for taking care of details now so when the glitches come, we won’t panic…we hope! That’s Plan A, anyway. Do not panic!!

After all, it’s just a glitch. And bride and groom will be husband and wife come 5:20pm (give or take a few minutes) on March 21, 2015 no matter how many of our so carefully planned details go down the wedding glitch drain.

In practical terms, every wedding has some very basic details that must be attended to. There must be a bride and a groom, a preacher or justice of the peace, two witnesses, a marriage license and a date/time/place for these folks to show up and have the ceremony and then sign off on said marriage license. That’s the basic details. Every other detail is the icing on the cake.

For this MOB and her bride daughter, though, we like lots of icing (figuratively and literally)!! But we have not been extravagant either in budget or design. We’ve worked hard to keep a healthy balance as we’ve learned a balanced life doesn’t just happen, it does take effort.

So what have we learned about wedding details?

1. We’ve forgotten something. Don’t know what it is yet, but there will be a detail or two or three we’ve forgotten. When said detail is remembered, handle it. That’s all you can do.
2. The more attendants you have the more details there are! Lots of fun and wouldn’t change it, but it does increase detail management. But it also increases the workforce!
3. Planning long distance increases the amount of details and increases the chances for details missed. Can’t change it, so go with the flow.
4. The reception carries not only the largest chunk of wedding budget, but also the largest amount of details. Be sure to work with a venue and/or person who gets this and is willing to guide you through the myriad of details involved in a wedding reception.
5. As often as is needed, get the details down in writing. This not only applies for church and venue contracts, but also with timelines for the wedding party, photographer and others. Don’t rely on verbal instructions. Write things down and get it before the eyes of those who need to see it.
6. If budget allows, hire out as much as you can or delegate like crazy or both. Saving $200 bucks may sound great until you’re shopping at midnight at WalMart the night before the wedding because groomsmen found the meat for the reception in the fridge and ate half.
7. Surround yourself with willing and able hands. Valerie and I could probably do it all ourselves, but why!? Half the fun of planning a wedding is doing the planning with people we love and they love us. It’s been a joy to share in these kinds of moments. That’s what we’ll remember, not the details.
8. In light of #7, delegate, delegate, delegate. And then delegate some more, especially the day of the wedding. Things won’t get done just the way you want, but who cares! Things will get done and you will or should be able to relax and enjoy this special day.
9. You must have alternate plans. It matters not what season of the year your wedding day takes place, the weather can change everything. Too hot, too cold, ice, snow, tornadoes, or crashing rain will all change your details. Even a few sniffles, or God forbid, flu bugs and the like will indeed change your details.
10. Don’t sweat the details, but do take care of them. There is a difference between the two.

Plan A-Don’t Panic Wedding is in full swing for this bride and MOB. The test will be in 10 days when I arrive for wedding week. But, with God’s help I think there will be few panic moments and trust they will be fleeting. We have too much to celebrate, too many loved ones to embrace and enjoy to let a few detail glitches spoil “V-Day”!!